Sympathy For The Devil

Had to worked third shift to cover for Nick. It appears that Nick has left for some missionary position in Montana. My boss informed me that Nick can no longer work with me and that our conversations have given Nick the urge to “find God”.

Whilst I was covering the shit around three in the morning, the janitor rudely knocked on my door while I was sleeping. I quickly turned the television the most satanic television show I could think of, so as to make the environment less hospitable and send my unwanted guest back out. Tuned into Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Turns out Bob the janitor loves Buffy and wanted to stay the entire hour to watch. During the show Bob proceeds to tell me about how he was in the military during his youth and how he got wrapped up in devil worship. Then he tells me how he himself “found God’. Then he proceeds to lecture me on why I need to “find God”. Upon hearing this, I quickly inform him that if I wanted a church sermon I would go to church instead of the bar I usually haunt. Then tell him that under no circumstances is he allowed back into my office ever. As he was leaving suggest that he hire someone with better looks and then I gave him a box of Crest white strips to take the stain out of his one tooth.